Sampson Spadafore

My Gender is a Funeral

“Thank you to all those good assassins who contributed to the death of my former self.”
-John Patrick Shanley, Savage in Limbo

My gender is a funeral
And I’m holding a memorial service for my former self
All the transgender fags
The transsexual dykes
The crossdressing queers
And those of us too outrageous to fixate on a label
Will file into the pews of the Church of Transcendence
A religion I’ve just made up for this occasion
 
And everyone will be dressed to the nines
Boas, glitter, rhinestones, sequin
Leather, pearls, gowns, tuxes
Dressed however the fuck they want
Or dressed in nothing at all
 
Laying in an eco-friendly cardboard casket
My former self will be cradled, swaddled even
Tucked in for the eternal sleep
My former self’s hands gently wrapped around
A bouquet of realities that no longer serve me
 
We’ll say our goodbyes and good riddance
I’ll shed a single tear
Before we raise a glass, lower the disco ball
And turn up the music!
The processional will block traffic
Fist raise bricks to the heavens
Chants of new beginnings fill the streets
 
My gender is making the news
My gender is on the centerfold of playboy
My gender is in every lit magazine
My gender is lighting up every screen
My gender is ringing out like a shot heard around the world
 
My gender is a funeral and a rebirth
A renaissance and a revival
A beginning and an ending
 
My gender is a father and a mother
An Uncle and an Auntie
And a second cousin twice removed
 
My gender is a lover
My gender is a fighter
My gender is everything and nothing all at once and
 
Thank god for all those good assassins
Who contributed to the death of my former self 
 
May she rest in peace